Lies about Love
by Pinball Queen
Summary: Lily is in love with James, but she really doesn't want to admit it, because she's afraid of being hurt, and she can't make herself believe that James really does love her. Disclaimer on my profile.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey everyone. This is my first fanfic, but I've written many personal ones, that no one has read except for me and I've been reading fan fiction for a long time. Constructive criticism and any sort of comment is much appreciated!**

**Disclaimer is on my profile.**

* * *

James sat in the seat across from me and strumming his fingers against the cushion next to him, it was making an awful slapping sound. I was sitting here trying to write song lyrics for my parents… I promised them a video of my new song when I came back for Christmas break, but James was distracting me. I finally lost my patience and snapped.

"Stop it Potter!" James looked up straight into my eyes, like he could see right to my soul.

"Why is this bothering you? If you came and sat here, I'd stop you know." James replied with a smile. Why oh WHY did Maria's brother have to be James, why him? Maria, my best friend, is always followed everywhere by her twin, James. I looked over at Maria for help but she was dead asleep.

"Please" I asked him, "Just stop" James smiled and shook his head no. I let out a cry of annoyance. See, this is what I hate about him, he turns something so simple into something so annoying, he knows just how to push my buttons. I looked down at the blank paper in my notebook, what in the world am I going to write about. This was the first time my mind really went blank when I was trying to write a song. I let out a miserable sigh and tore the blank paper out of my note book, sure it was a waste of paper, but annoyed people don't think straight.

I crumpled up the paper and threw it at James, but he swatted it away before it got close to touching him. I stared at the seat next to James and then at my paper.

I really love James, but I won't admit it, he's just after me for the challenge, once I let my guard drop he'll swoop in and break my heart. It's easier to pretend to hate, even though I do hate certain traits about him.

"Lily." James said stroking the leather chair seat next to him, "Come sit with me." I shook my head and brought my quill to my paper.

_I don't think that empty train seat_

_Has ever looked this good to me._

I wrote those 2 lines before snapping my notebook shut and sticking it in the luggage compartment above my seat. James, I'm writing about James. I sighed and tried to sneak a look at James, but his eyes bored into mine, was he looking at me this whole time?

"What're you writing Evans, your face is all red, did you write about me." James pestered.

"No, I did not right about you Potter, stop assuming everything revolves around you 'cuz when you ASSume you make an ASS out of you and me." Yes, I Lily Ann Evans just said that…

I got that from my grandpa… my GRANDPA, and I juts used it on James Potter. James snorted and kept looking straight at me, wasn't he even embarrassed? Even a little bit? But his eyes said no, they looked straight through my soul. I swear that guy can see through everything. I swear everything.

"Potter what colour underwear am I wearing?" I asked to test him. He blushed, not when I said underwear but when I said colour. He shrugged and finally looked away. I dunno what I just did to him but it worked!

* * *

"Hey, Lils." James said finally breaking the hours long silence. I looked up at him.

"Hmm?" I asked, wait… I'm being too nice. "What do you want Potter and don't call me Lils."

"Well LILS, we're almost there so you should but on your uniform." I pulled down my suitcase from the luggage compartment and took out my robe and tie. I wore a pair of grey pin striped shorts and white button down tank top with a collar. I wore it so I'd be dressed appropriately for the weather and be able to quickly change into a Hogwarts approved uniform. I fastened my maroon and gold tie and pulled my black robe over both. Okay, I'm ready. Hogwarts 7th and final year… here I come.

* * *

**So, what do you think? Do I have a strong story going? Are you interested? Please REVIEW and tell me! I know it's pretty short, but this is just an introduction. Next chapter will be posted when I have 2 reviews, like the second I get online, I'll post the next chapter… if I have 2 reviews.**


	2. Chapter 2

So, thank you so much to those of you who reviewed! It mean so much to me, really, um, I haven't look or a beta reader yet, so my apologizes. I'm off to do that right now.

Okay, onto the story! Disclaimer is on my profile page.

**Lily climbed into the Thestral drawn carriage. Everyone at Hogwarts with a brain knew that the carriages didn't just pull themselves, Thesrals, were invisible creatures to those who had never seen death. They had white shining eyes, dragonish faces and necks, and skeletal black bodies. Lily had never seen one, but as bitter sweet as it seems… she wish she could. They sounded graceful and beautiful, but it seem ridiculously stupid to wish for that. Lily shook her head.**

"**Lils?" Maria asked, "Lils, you okay… you've been zoning out for like… the last 5 minutes." I looked up into Maria's beautiful chocolate brown eyes. **

"**Sorry Maria, I'm… thinking." I smiled at her. Maria Potter, she's elegant and beautiful. She has everything I don't. Her lips and red and plump, her face is heart shaped, her eyes are large and chocolate brown framed by thick long lashes, silky black hair framed her face. Maria Rose Potter was breath taking.**

**I, on the other hand, have wavy red hair, white-ishly pale skin with freckles scattered across my cheeks. The only thing about me that is, as you'd say, brag worthy are my eyes. They are big, round and forest green.**

"**Evans… why can Mary call you Lils and I can't?" James teased. I jumped when I heard his voice and turned sharply toward him. Since when was he here? **

"**Potter!" I exclaimed with my hand over my heart, "You'll be the death of me! I don't want you calling me Lils because you use that name with false admiration… it's insulting and sickening and frankly I loathe it!" That was the secret with boys, use big words and they'll just be clueless. Surely enough James tilted his head to the side, his eyes were looking into my soul again. I wanted to flinch away from his gaze but it was mesmerizing. **

"**Could you dumb that down?" he asked tilting his head to the side even farther.**

"**Maria!" I cried out, "kill me, please…no kill him!" I closed my eyes, "I'm going prematurely gray Potter, please." James head went farther to the side and Maria giggled.**

"**Lily Bug, you aren't gray… you're peach-ish white. Don't worry, the only gray people I've ever seen are in old muggle pictures and movies, I don't think you'll turn gray." James head was so far to the side now that it looked painful. Maria just burst out into laughter. I even laughed a little. James joined in laughing as well.**

**When the laughter died down and James' head was upright again he asked, "Why were we laughing?" James was completely serious, that's why it was so funny.**

"**James, she meant her hair, when women get old their hair turns white or gray, but it can be caused by stress or a traumatic experience." Maria explained to James. He nodded, I'm pretty sure most of that he understood.**

"Mary- bary, what would I do without you?" James cuddled into Maria's side and Maria stroked his hair laughing. One thing I'm definitely jealous of is their bond. I want what they have… whether it's with a twin or a lover. It was really nice seeing James separated from the rest of the Marauders. If he had been with them, he would've pretended the whole gray thing had been a joke the whole time. Without the Marauders James was a completely different person, sweeter and truer to himself.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

"Ah, we're here! Hogwarts!" Maria called out to herself. "I'm already breathing easier." she exclaimed. I laughed and hugged her from behind. James had slipped off to find Sirius leaving the two of us alone. Now that he was gone I felt way less tense.

Maria maneuvered herself around in my tight embrace. Maria turned herself around facing me and hugged me back. "Does James really stress you THAT much Lils? He likes you, you know."

I brushed off the talk about James and kept walking. We were now inside Hogwarts great hall and we we're gonna have our feast. I couldn't help it, "Yummy feast!" I said side hugging Maria. She laughed and hugged my arms.

"I'm high on you." Maria said in a husky bad imitation of a mans voice. We both broke out in laughter and sat down at the Gryfindor table. All the food was out. I began helping myself as Dumbledore gave his welcoming speech.

James came into the great hall a few minutes after the new students had been sorted. He was covered head to toe in repulsive yellow powder and accompanied by Sirius, Remus, and Peter, all whom were covered in the smelly yellow stuff as well. James plopped down right across from me and Maria sat and grinned at me. I looked him up and down.

"What is that yellow shit?" I asked wrinkling my nose. James and Sirius laughed at my choice of words and then Peter joined in once he noticed the other 2 laugh. Remus kept his face down and snorted a little.

"This, m'dear was… a spell gone wrong." James said and he sprung into a full description of the spell and what was supposed to happen. "… so Sirius ended up reading soap as soup and he added dragon bane's SOUP, who knows what in the world that was, and since the cleanliness potion obviously called for soap as it's main ingredient and since we didn't have that ingredient it didn't come close to working and when we mixed it, 3 times clockwise, 7 times counter clockwise 5 times it exploded!"

I actual listened to the whole thing with great interest for two reasons, one he was talking about something somewhat intellectual and two, well, it was him talking. I looked at Sirius.

"You idiot! How do you mistake an a for a u!?" the foursome, and Maria, all started laughing even though what I just said wasn't that funny. I dug into my lasagna and kept my eyes away from James'.

+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+

James ran to catch up with me after dinner.

"Hey Lily Billy! Wait up! Liiileee!" I kept walking. Lils, please don't ignore me." I turned around and raised my eyebrows. His gorgeous eyes stared into mine. His gorgeous eyes, they were a warm brown, but when you looked closer you could see the different colours that made them seem that warm brown. Yellow, was on the inside, and the outside was almost black, but the two colours blended together in the most perfect way. There were specks of purple and gray scattered around. I yearned to tell him how beautiful he was.

I didn't realize it, but we'd been staring into each other's eyes for, maybe a full minute… or longer. "Good Night James Potter." I whispered and left his alone in the common room, I ran up the stair way to my dorm.

When I got into my room, I opened my suitcase and dug through for my notebook, I was overflowing with feelings and need to write them down before I burst.

_He tells me about his spell_

_I count the colours in his eyes._

This song about James was seeming pretty rough now, but it had definite possibilities, it needs to be written, edited, re-read, edited again, and so on… it would turn out perfect. I smiled and put my notebook under my pillow.

I closed my eyes and thought of instruments and tunes for it. Maybe cello? Or piano, or… oh! Guitar, this would be a guitar song. I started humming to myself, making up guitar tunes and I hummed myself to sleep that night.

**Okay, how am I doing? When I get 3 more reviews, I'll post the next chapter. I love y'all! Please review,**


End file.
